I figured out about ten minutes ago that I am going to graduate in December as planned. Earlier this semester I was feeling completely overrun with school (18 credits) and decided to drop a few classes and just graduate the following May. Well, after looking at my degree audit, I only need 17 credits. And the classes I am taking are relatively easy. The reason this semester has been so hard is because I took a lot of time consuming classes. This brings me right into...
My future.
For the past few months I have put my future on the back burner with the thought process of God is control, He will take care of it. So when people asked about my summer plans or graduation plans, I said stuff like: "I don't know, wherever God wants me." Sure that sounds great and Biblical, but really, was I expecting God to mail me a letter specifying what I should do with my life in bullet points and italicized font?
I've been a Christian my whole life so those church answers are easy to come up with - at the same time, I think I've used those 'church phrases' as an excuse to not make any decisions and think about my future. Now that I'm finally being honest and seeing that I will be a college graduate in a matter of months, I'm a little freaked out. Yes, I should be relying on God with my decisions. But sitting around isn't going to cut it. This is a new thought process for me so I'm still not exactly sure what my plans are - I just know I need to start making some and then allowing God to maneuver them according to His will.
Speaking of His will for my life, God has done many things in my heart this semester, particularly these last few months. I went on my first overseas missions trip to Costa Rica and although it was only one week, it has impacted my life and the lives of those around me. Because I have changed, others have reaped the benefits. I have become a better mom, friend, sister and Ambassador for Christ. In Costa Rica I learned that I have a desire to see God's Kingdom grow. I learned that life is very different outside the United States and I no longer take our fancy public restrooms for granted. I learned what it means to seek after Christ. And yet, it was only the tip of the sword. There is more to be found in my walk with God and that is what I continue to seek in the midst of my busy life back in Idaho.
I think in Costa Rica I learned to listen. I had to listen to a new language, a new culture. I had to listen in order to understand. Since I've been back, I don't listen to music and the radio nearly as often. I have turned the radio on a few times but it was just monotonous noise. Instead of plugging my ipod into my ear while I clean for three hours, I allow silence. I am no longer stressed out. Instead I have found that by limiting the noise around me I am able to think deeper and understand more. It's a little hard to explain.
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